Natural Attachment

Lovely Lune over here posted about strewing and now I am returning the favor!

I came across the term ’strewing’ by chance or accident back in 2002 when I was pregnant with Elijah. I had been doing a Google search for ’stewing tomatoes’ and somehow ’stewing’ was still in my search bar when I typed in ‘unschooling’. To my amazement, there was an article about ’strewing’ and someone had just misspelled it in the URL (I have looked for this particular article for 45 minutes now and haven’t found it)!

I thought that the idea of leaving things around for your child to discover on their own and use however they liked was awesome. I read tons of articles and online discussion board debates about strewing — the whys, hows & whens as well as the why nots, how nots and when nots of strewing. It also seemed to be common sense to me. If one was to facilitate their child’s education at home and not strew, then I couldn’t imagine their being much of an education occurring. After all, you have to be exposed to things (even if only in a textbook) to learn about it…barring those things which happen organically from living life, like gravity, cellular regeneration, respiration and so on. I mean, if you never left the house, had no t.v./computer or severally limited them and didn’t fill your house with all sorts of goodies for kidlets to explore, then you might as well send them to school, unless that’s what you were doing at home — ’school-at-home’.

I forgot about strewing until Elijah was about 3.5 yrs old and someone asked me a question about it. She specifically asked me, “how do you strew?”  I panicked for a minute because I wasn’t even sure I had been strewing…had I forgotten such an important aspect of unschooling? I thought about it for a couple of minutes and then it clicked. I had been strewing all along. All the books, toys, activities, crafts, arts, music, television shows, games, museums, parks, digging in the yard and so on. Everywhere I looked around me in my house showed signs of things which had been strewn and discovered and a couple still to be discovered. Everything that you provide your child with for the purpose of exploration and joy is something that has been strewn.

I think the reason many people are so hung up on strewing is that they have or feel that they need to have expectations or intentions behind the items they are strewing. As if, items have to be ‘educational’ or they feel like something can only be used a certain way or at a certain time. When you limit yourself to only providing ‘educational’ things and things which you limit the use of, then you are really not strewing. This same mother who asked me about strewing said that she had purchased some activity kits and they were all themed (magnets, kitchen chemistry, beading, etc.) and that she was upset that her children were not using the materials the way they were designed to be used and she felt like she had wasted her money. I assured her that the very fact that they were using the stuff, meant that she had spent her money wisely!

As adults we really need to keep letting go of all these expectations that we glue onto the back of everything and everyone. I realize that most of us grew up in homes with parents who had expectations for every aspect of our lives, but that doesn’t mean that we have to perpetuate that cycle. Children are very imaginative and creative; seeing infinite potential in everything when we only see what the instructions on the box say.

So, “how do you strew”? Whenever you are out or online and looking for something for your child or happen to see something, get it and stick it somewhere or give it to them. “I found this the other day and thought you might be interested in it”, can be appropriate for some children. I’d just pretty much stick it on a shelf on their level or in their room with their things and let them discover it and come to you with their excitement, ideas, creations and yes, sometimes their disappointment. Just like when you are out and about and see something that your partner or best friend might like…you don’t hand it to them and then instruct them on how, when or why to use it.

Have fun leaving surprises around for your awesome kids.

Strewing