Natural Attachment

I am always trying to advocate this idea to everyone I meet. I talk about being authentic to yourself and your child. Honoring the authentic needs and abilities of those around you. I’ve mentioned being authentic to my homebirthing clients’ needs. I hope that one day we can all learn this ability and rebuild our ‘tribes’ for the sake of everyone’s wellbeing.

THE DAILY GROOVE ~ by Scott Noelle
www.enjoyparenting.com/dailygroove

:: Rethinking Sociality ::

We humans are social animals, and for the vast
majority of humanity’s time on Earth, human societies
took the form of *tribes*.

Modern civilization has undermined our innate
sociality in many ways. For example, the “virtue” of
self-sacrifice for the collective good defies our
natural pleasure orientation.

In a healthy tribal society, where everyone is
emotionally *attuned* with everyone else, individual
and collective pleasure go hand in hand, for there is
more pleasure to be had when one’s choices serve both
oneself *and* the collective.

But in our society, with its complexity, alienation,
and legacy of “dominator” values, it takes an
extraordinary kind of consciousness for one to
re-create that interpersonal attunement in a way that
actually feels good.

Think about the things you say and do in order to “be
social” — especially around your children and other
parents. Do you ever sacrifice your authenticity to
appear “good” or “nice”?

You may notice that being socially appropriate (i.e.,
doing/saying the “right” thing) frequently requires
you to be INauthentic.

For example, in certain parenting situations you may
feel social pressure to *control* your child when
you’d rather be relaxed and accepting.

Quite often the real purpose of “being social” is
to protect others from their own small-mindedness.
Such is the case when mothers are pressured to
avoid nursing in public.

So being authentic — even when it seems “anti-social”
– may actually be *more* social, because it creates
opportunities for others to question their limiting
beliefs.

When you honor Who You Really Are — *and* you
look beyond others’ disempowering beliefs to honor
Who THEY Really Are — you contribute to the greater
good of society.

Today, whenever you choose authenticity over
conventional sociality, decide that you *are* being
social… They just don’t know it yet!

http://dailygroove.net/sociality

Feel free to forward this message to your friends!
(Please include this paragraph and everything above.)
Copyright (c) 2008 by Scott Noelle

Instead of marking this day for celebrating our nation’s freedom from one ruling class (England) and turning into a ruling class and death sentence for another nation (Native Americans), I’d like to share today’s Daily Groove.

THE DAILY GROOVE ~ by Scott Noelle

:: A Declaration of Inter-dependence ::

Parents who practice attachment parenting are often
accused of neglecting their children's development
of independence.

Strangely, these accusations usually come from the
same folks who advise us to take swift disciplinary
action the moment our children exhibit signs of
independence, now re-labeled "disobedience."

Thankfully, we have the reassurance of the Founding
Mothers and Fathers of holistic parenting whose
"spoiled" kids are growing up to be remarkably
independent!

Today is Independence Day in America, so let's write
our own Declaration of Independence from the culture
of alienation:

"We hold these Truths to be self-evident, that all
Children are created Lovable, that they are endowed,
by their Creator, with certain unalienable Rights,
that among these are Life, Liberty, and the Happiness
of Parental Proximity. . . ."

http://dailygroove.net/independence-day

Feel free to forward this message to your friends!
(Please include this paragraph and everything above.)
Copyright (c) 2008 by Scott Noelle